Card Counter Camouflage
Two guys were riding in an elevator in Boston. The first guy says, “You’re from Harvard, aren’t you?” The second guy says, “Sure, how did you know?” “Well, you’re wearing a tweed coat with a wool tie, your shoes are polished, and your hair is neat.” The Harvard guy then asks, “You’re from M.I.T., right?” The other guy was shocked. “Yeah, how did you know?” The Harvard guy says, “I saw your finger in your nose.”
The problem with the M.I.T. blackjack team was that they didn’t put their fingers in their noses frequently enough.
That is a rude way of saying they didn’t effectively camouflage that they were card counters.
I don’t mean to throw otalaryngological slurs at the M.I.T. team. After all these guys went to one of the greatest universities in the world, made hundreds of thousands if not millions, lived a sweet life, at least for a while, wrote a best-selling book, had articles written about them, got a movie deal (“21” is due out this year), and hung out with movie stars. That’s good enough life’s work for most of us. You, however, are reading this not to become famous writers or have a movie made about you, although that would be nice, but to learn how to make money playing blackjack. They, after all is said, did it for only a couple of years before they had to quit.
Why do we become card counters, and card players in general, anyway? We don’t like the 9 to 5 routine. We don’t like bosses. We want to be able to take vacations whenever we want. We, errrr, want to be able to deduct lavish trips as business expenses. The M.I.T. guys had that, but now some of them are teaching in their blackjack school.
The worst thing a card-counter can do is become famous. Like my good friend Bruno, aka “The Bunny,” says, “Da only famous counters are da ex-counters.” Then they are no longer card-counters because they’ll be barred. It’s a dark world we live in, but that’s why we can survive. That’s also why any estimates of the number of people making a living playing blackjack are grossly underestimated.
One of the most effective means of hiding your being a card counter is varying your bet contrary to what a system would dictate. According to the complete point count system that I play, the bet is one- half of the “high-low index” calculated after seeing all the cards played in the previous hand. If the index is 0 or negative, you bet your minimum bet.
Unfortunately, if you follow this betting guideline they’ll spot you as a counter and boot you out of the casino.
That is very bad news. Counters can experience big winnings when the deck gets hot, indicated by a large value of the high-low index, and not increasing your bet appropriately can significantly reduce your winnings. On the other hand, if you’re banned from playing you can’t win anything. Like the M.I.T. team.
This quandary, though, can be used to your advantage. You have to realize that the vast majority of dealers are too bored to count the cards, and most pit bosses won’t bother either. The main way they detect a counter is by observing wild fluctuations in your betting. This is especially true if you, knowing that many ten-value cards and Aces remain in the deck, increased your bet substantially and got a blackjack or a pair of ten-value cards. They may then start to watch you carefully.
We as counters have two counter strategies. First, generally limit the maximum bet you lay down to four or five times your minimum bet. When you do increase your bet make some comment about “feeling lucky.”
Second, if the deck gets really hot, indicated by an exceptionally large value of the high-low index, then go ahead and violate your maximum bet rule by betting a large amount. That will draw the attention of both the pit boss and the guy behind the one-way mirror in the ceiling. The pit boss may even walk over and start to observe your play.
To throw both of them off, bet a large amount on the first hand after the dealer shuffles. The deck is neutral and hopefully you’ll win. To further throw them off, put down a large bet when the deck goes cold. Hopefully you’ll get lucky and win. After all, blackjack is a game of chance as well as skill. Making an infrequent strategy move contrary to your card counting system doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll get destroyed. You don’t win all your bets when the deck is hot, just like you don’t lose all your bets when the deck is cold.
If the pit boss is counting along, he will immediately leave you, figuring you just bet erratically. Hopefully the guy in the ceiling will stop watching you, too. With both gone, and the dealer not interested, you can then feel free to raise your bet significantly on future hands when the deck becomes hot.
I like to play at Jessie Beck’s Riverside in Reno. It’s across the river from the main street, and the atmosphere is less intense. I like the classy black and white uniforms with the frilly blouses. Also, I always seem to win there.
One trip I had made a nice winning in the morning shift and came back for the afternoon. I had a male dealer, about 40, and he seemed to enjoy dealing to me. After winning my self-imposed limit of 20 units of my minimum bet, I decided to repay the casino by having a snack in their restaurant. Halfway through, a man asked if he could join me. I looked up. It was the dealer.
I was a little shocked, but I figured I could pick his brain. Maybe we could become friends and the next time I came in he’d be kind enough to shuffle up the deck at my request when it became cold.
After a few minutes, he said that in the morning shift he had been up in the sky, watching me play from behind the one-way mirror. “I couldn’t figure out what you were doing,” he said. That meant that although I was winning, it seemed as if I was lucky, and not a counter.
“I had to be your dealer for an hour to figure out you’re a counter. You’re the best counter I’ve ever seen.”
“Well,” I thought, “that’s nice.” Since we were now colleagues, sharing mutual respect, I wanted to know what gave me that “best counter” status.
“You were throwing me off with your betting pattern,” he said.
Most counters are predictable in varying their bet. When the deck gets hot, they increase their bet. When the deck gets cold, they decrease it to their minimum. Every once in a while, I had lowered my bet to my minimum when the deck got hot or increased it when the deck got cold. That’s one of my moves that threw him off and made me “the best counter” he’d ever seen.
You vary your bet contrary to what the system directs not only to get that irritating pit boss to walk away, with his face all smirky at having seen another idiot with a “system,” but also to convince the guy behind the one-way mirror in the ceiling that you’re no threat.
You can also hide your betting pattern by using relativistic and quantum-mechanical high-tech devices, some undoubtedly invented by those M.I.T. guys now that they’re barred from casinos. Less exotic devices also work.
During one trip to Las Vegas, my identical twin brother was given a toy slot machine as a souvenir from our luxury hotel. Actually, my being a student at the time, we stayed at a motel, the legendary Westward Ho, next to the somewhat more legendary Stardust.
My brother discovered that if he pushed in the sides of the toy slot with his thumb and index finger, it came up a winning three cherries. Without that pressure, the slot would come up other, non-winning combinations.
He took it to the casinos. Before each bet he’d pull the handle on the toy slot and show the result to everyone at the table. If the deck was hot, he’d push in the sides and show everyone, including the dealer, the three cherries. He’d bet. If the deck was cold, he’d pull the handle but wouldn’t push in the sides and of course he wouldn’t bet.
Over and over again, when the good luck toy slot came up cherries, he’d win. When it didn’t, he’d lay out, and almost everyone at the table would lose.
At the Four Queens downtown, he almost lost the toy slot. For 4 straight deals everyone lost, but, with the deck being cold, my brother sat out. Then the deck got hot and he placed a large bet and got blackjack.
The guy sitting next to him got enraged and grabbed for the toy slot, saying, “Let me see that slot machine!” Yes, that toy slot had magical powers–one could feel its presence. Those magical powers had been imbued in that toy slot machine by an Essence far beyond the understanding of beings on this inconsequential planet.
Generally, if you sit you have to play, a casino rule to prevent counters from playing systems. Here, though, was a freaky guy with this freaky toy, and how could the dealer or pit boss argue with that?
If you don’t happen to have a defective toy plastic slot machine around, you can use other high-tech devices to query the wishes of the gods. Rigged dice, a stacked deck of cards, or a rigged carton full of red (don’t bet) and green (do bet) balls would all work.
Some of these are taken from the usual bag of tricks of amateur magicians. If the red balls, for example, are smooth and the green balls are rough, you can feel around for the one you want to pull out.
Vary your bet, erratically at times. Use magical devices. It’s part of camouflaging your being a card counter, ensuring you’ll be able to play without being detected and suffering the fate of the M.I.T. blackjack team.
Right now, it’s winter in Chicago and I have a bit of a nose cold. Wait a second till I get a tissue. On the other hand…
Les Golden’s first book of cartoons, “Endangered Species Love This Book,” has recently been published in the U.S. An ardent environmentalist and animal welfare advocate, half of Les’ earnings from the book will go to relevant non-profit groups. Comments, questions, and suggestions for future columns can be sent to Les at lesgoldencardcounting@yahoo.com.
You vary your bet not only to get that irritating pit boss to walk away, but also to convince the guy behind the one-way mirror in the ceiling that you’ no threat.
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